Group Favorite Quotes
*Quotes presented in this page do not reflect the official view regarding various topics, including safety, math and science, of the Simpson Group.

Tim: "I haven't broken anything."
Camila: "Well because you don't really do much anyways!"
— Talk after someone so-and-so broke a glass slide (July 07, 2022).
"I'm going to leave a bad review."
— Camila's response on Simpson's Lab (June 23, 2022).

Gwen: "I have a strong nose."
Tim (with a grin): "Really? So, you lift with your nose?"
— Tim's punny response to Gwen's sensitive nose (July 01, 2022).
"Sorry, I am just smiling and laughing because I am proud that I understood Garth for the first time!"
— Tim's response after reiterating Garth's explanation on his research (June 29, 2022).
"I wish I was a laser... maybe then I will be worth $50K."
— During F-PTIR meeting and talking about QCL (May 13, 2022).

"You GOTTA earn your stars!"
— Gwen's response to Camila's quote on leaving bad reviews (July 01, 2022).
"I am just a moving consciousness."
— She is just a moving consciousness (June 29, 2022).
"Didn't pass the vibe check."
— When we found out that the HT-FRAP wells looked bad (May 19, 2022).

Tim: "Why did you send me the email? What was it about?"
Garth (with a grin): "I don't know.. That's why I sent it to you and those in the project to figure it out!"
— Tim asking Garth why the email was sent because both were confused what the email was about (June 6, 2022).
"Spongebob Squarepants? Should really be: Spongebob Rectangular Cuboidpants."
— Garth explaining rods during a Rods meeting.
"MY BRAIN!"
— When Emma asked "Where does this matrix come from", Garth replied.
"Mmm.. infinite π. I haven't had lunch yet."
— After staring at math for a long time, Garth said.
"It's gonna be okay."
— Garth tried to comfort Emma when science went wrong.
"I'm just thinking... Bob Fischetti? BFF?"
— When being told that Dr. Robert Fischetti's middle initial was F, Garth found an interesting fact.
"Many moons ago, we hit a crystal with a protein..."
— "Ouch", said crystal.
"Can I take you through the math? You don't have to listen!"
— When Garth made an attempt to enjoy life.
"What if we microtome a Jolly Rancher?"
— Garth proposed a new project.

Sasha: "Nothing funny happened between Hilary and Tim."
Dustin: "Yup, because of Covid."
— Sasha's complain on no funny quotes on the website after Hilary for a while (June 3, 2022).
"Just write down whatever I say."
— Sasha's tip to Timothy on picking up good quotes (June 3, 2022).

Casey: "Hilary check your email!"
Hilary: "Oh no, did we get a review."
— Email about new first years joining group.
"Echo, play Africa."
— Hilary as she was explaining how much she hates the song Africa.
"Was I supposed to READ that?"
— Hilary questioning an approximately 10,000 word department email.

"The authors understand that math is hard. We are going to do it anyway."
— Casey in reply to reviewer comments.
"Oh I love Lord of the Rings!"
— Casey responding to the question "Who else likes horror movies?"

Garth: "We should use the Mahalanobis distance; it would be more accurate."
Youlin: ". . ."
Youlin: "Love is a luxury."
— Youlin zoning out during project meeting.
"If you haven't noticed, I'm the definition of trying too hard."
— Youlin trying too hard to get a new quote.
"I don't get it. It's horrible tasting."
— Youlin eating some type of American food.
"If you keep drinking water you'll die."
— Youlin advocating for consumption of hot water.

Nita: "Sreya are you analytical or physical?"
Sreya: "I don't know I've just been screwing and unscrewing things for the past 5 years."
— Sreya explaining the main work of her Ph.D career.
"Do you know anybody who likes very nice packaging?"
— Sreya trying to determine who Alex got for Secret Santa.

"Commitment and I'm an alcoholic."
— Alex doesn't remember what this is about, since he is an alcoholic."

"We've been talking about food for three hours."
— Scott after we were talking about food for three hours.

Cody: "What up dog?"
Shijie: ". . ."
Shijie: ". . ."
Shijie: "Yeah . . ."
— Awkward interaction between Shijie and Cody.

"Scott, move! It's science! Why do you think you are here?"
— Janny to Scott when trying to shoot him with a Nerf gun.
"...I've been touching kids all day."
— Said Janny during PLU discovery days.
"Not if you practice!"
— When Paul pointed out that the beer run didn't appear to be safe, Safety Officer Janny gave an authorized reply.
"What's a blizzard? ... it doesn't sound like a real thing: it has two Z's in it!"
— When talking about an actual upcoming blizzard in town, Janny said.

"Think about what normal people would do."
— Justin accidentally did an honest review of the group.
"Well that's comparing apples and oranges... not even oranges... like, shoes!"
— Justin questioned the logic behind a manuscript.
"One photon to the other."
— Garth asked "What's the TPA ratio", and Justin calmly answered.
"Maybe you should take 621."
— Justin recommended that Garth take his own course.
"I don't like tomatoes... so chili is difficult for me."
— Justin complained how hard life was when the group went for chili for lunch.
"Oops."
— Said Justin right after he broke an expensive instrument, re-using Shane's quote to save resources and the planet.

"Garth is wrong; StarTrek is right!"
— When arguing about serious scientific theories, Shane stated.
"Oops."
— Said Shane after knocking down a hard drive which Chris had put in an obviously unsafe place.

"... like that's some kind of good thing!"
— Emma made her mind and popped the over-optimism.
"My presentation is gonna be crap... but it's okay because the pizza will be good."
— Emma pointed out the essence of group meetings.

"Why is vvDFG always in Garth's imagination?"
— Shijie asked why a meeting on group calendar for a project never happened. Location of the meeting read, "Garth's imagination".
"It tastes like chiral."
— When Garth asked how the new SHG coffee tasted, Shijie replied.

"Nothing in this lab is linear."
— When Ximeng introduced the group to visitors.

"I mean from a cost standpoint, I have to think it would be cheaper to just grow raspberries than to harvest beavers."
—Paul expressed his opinion on using beaver secretion for artificial raspberry flavor.